Dear Dogs,

Dear Rock & Jazz,

Seriously. This has not been a good 24 hours for us as a dog family. To start, I come home from work to find that Uncle George has stuck you in the wrong crates. I don't blame you for being unhappy. Especially Jazz. Since after I left, Rock you evidently pissed in your crate. And since you were then put in Jazz's crate, you didn't really care. Poor Jazzy was forced into the crate she hates - which had been pissed in by you, Rock. So, Jazz, you did what any normal 11 lb. dog would do. You ate the side of the god damn crate and escaped. Well, shit.

So, mommy went to Petco with Aunt Mariah and bought you a new crate. I almost broke a finger trying to set it up, but finally, I did it. As I went to put the crate liner in the new crate, you, little Rocky, ran over and peed on my hand. And the crate liner. That was fabulous. Then I realized you had not only peed on your crate liner from earlier that day, the clean one I just had put in, but you peed in Jazz's crate during the day. Well, shit.

Speaking of shit, while I was washing your crate linens and bleaching the trays to get rid of your piss smell, one of you little assholes shit all over my room. Thanks. Love you.

So, little dogs, let's try to make today a better day. Let's hold our piss and shit until we are outside. Let's not eat crates. Let's make life easier for mommy while daddy is away for business since I have to clean up ALL of your messes when you do this.

Love,
Mommy